OK so first post I'm trying to set the bar so people will like my blog. So what better to talk about than something everyone hates.
Picture this, you've been sitting at your desk for the past 3 hours when oh yeah all of a sudden you feel the urge to pee. Just as you get up to go someone stops by your desk to have a conversation. Or maybe you are eavesdropping on a co-workers conversation about something interesting. Nevetheless you need to pee but you are nosey and want to know whats going on. So what do you do, you hold it of course. We've conditioned our bodies to hold it, when something we delegate as important comes along. However, there comes a point where you just can't hold it anymore. You look around making sure their is a clear path to the door. You make it out and whoop-dee-doo you're free. You walk in careful to not look like you are about to burst. You select a stall to your liking (I prefer the 3rd stall). Your pants are halfway down and then OMG OMG OMG OMG you've stepped into a disgusting puddle of something yellow. Ew, ew, ew...its pee-pee. Great, so now not only are your pants halfway down or worst around your ankles but there is pee on the floor and pee on the toilet seat. Now you're doing the "i really have to go dance, what do I do" and hurry because you're about to wet your pants, and its never ok as an adult to wet your pants unless you're a pregnant woman. So hurry up and make up your mind.
Chances are you know this scenario and it probably has happened to you. Yup it sucks alot when you really have to go but you have to clean up after someone but in all seriousness why should you. Honestly lets just all take a seat on a toilet that's why its there. While I do not have a protruding mass coming out of my groin area like many males (well some aren't protruding ...there are some that look like a woman's nether regions hahaha...OK I'm sorry I digressed) is it really that hard to sit on a toilet to pee. I absolutely despise when someone has just not only missed the toilet bowl but also has decided that the tile is now a yellow pool. Great, just our luck. Listen up people lets start teaching men to sit down, we probably should start them young. Lets teach our little boys that girls are not the only ones who should sit down on the toilet seat. I'm not going to get into the mechanics of squatting which is usually what most of us women prefer because honestly you can catch an STD from the toilet seat, or at least that's what you told your college boyfriend.
Ok, ok jokes aside. Peeing on the toilet seat is disgusting and peeing in the floor means you have no respect for your fellow man. C'mon if you miss the toilet bowl clean it up. You'd be surprise because urine is surprisingly very clean "in the absence of a disease condition" (direct quote from everybody's favorite dictionary, Wikipedia). It is the bodies way of excreting harmful toxins out of your body. YOUR BODY not someones which is why I'm not wanting to clean up your shit or pee for the purposes of this conversation. Get some manners and wipe off the damn toilet seat.
signed,
Someone who hits the bowl every time
This post was inspired by my co-workers and EI who actually cleaned up a pee covered toilet seat. BUT OMG PEOPLE.
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