Sorry to burst your bubble

So I'm not really sure what it is about me. Maybe its because I'm short, or cute, or cuddly. Or all of the above! Maybe its because I'm fun-sized, or that I can fit into most tall peoples pockets. Well I can't really fit into anyone's pockets but you get the general idea.

For some reason people love to stand really close to me. I'm not sure when exactly I turned from loving to be in close quarters with my fellow friends/humans etc. But I  really dislike tall people or really anyone for that matter being all up in my grill. And yes, I understand that I am annoyingly short, I mean my height on a good day is 5'0! So to most people I am small no matter what, even those people of average size.

Ok back to the point....which was my issue with personal space

I used to hate hand holding yeah me the biggest romantic ever, hated hand holding. And don't even get me started on my many significant others (just kidding or am I?) resting their arm around me. I used to love cuddling  while watching movies or sleeping. But now I'm like oh my god it gets hot being in someone else's armpit, and you have to deal with sweat and stench.

Somewhere down the line I realized that I do not want to be in close proximity to my fellow humans. Yes, there are parts in the world where personal space is pretty much non-existant. Paris for example. There are always these disgustingly cute couples or ugly couples making out right above peoples heads. Seriously I'm sure I got some saliva droppings in my hair because there was so much shoving of tongues down throats.  I understand that we all breathe the same air but I do not want to be breathing the same hot sweaty air that is coming out of your mouth, unless I invite you to do so.

Please don't be offended if you've been in my personal space and didn't realize that you were in fact bursting my bubble ---so to speak. Maybe I'm just getting old and crotchety but I don't like to be crowded and I feel like if you are not at least an arms (my arm specifically) width away from me you are probably making me feel slightly uncomfortable.

I've spent a lot of time making it look like I am in fact comfortable with people invading my bubble but in reality I'm actually cringing away from you on the inside and planning an escape route when you are in fact way to close for comfort. Lets be real people if I don't invite you to my bubble its probably because I'm a) claustrophobic b) you have bad breath c) I'm black or d) I'm just uncomfortable when people get to close to me physically. I'm trying to get over it really I am but I just don't know how to. In the mean time lets all just remember to take a couple steps back from each other, its a sign of respect and camaraderie plus I just may not deck you in the boob or give you a swift kick to your shin because those are really the only places I can actually reach. Har har har. Ok well I hope you space invaders have learned your lesson. I don't like you in my space ....so knock it off OK!